We've Always Got New York Read online

  We've Always Got New York

  JILL KNAPP

  A division of HarperCollinsPublishers

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  HarperImpulse an imprint of

  HarperCollinsPublishers Ltd

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  www.harpercollins.co.uk

  First published in Great Britain by HarperImpulse 2014

  Copyright © Jill Knapp 2014

  Cover images © Shutterstock.com

  Jill Knapp asserts the moral right

  to be identified as the author of this work.

  A catalogue record for this book is

  available from the British Library

  This novel is entirely a work of fiction.

  The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are

  the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to

  actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is

  entirely coincidental.

  All rights reserved under International

  and Pan-American Copyright Conventions.

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  written permission of HarperCollins.

  Ebook Edition © November 2014

  ISBN: 9780007594689

  Version 2014-10-22

  Digital eFirst: Automatically produced by Atomik ePublisher from Easypress.

  Praise for Jill Knapp

  "Fall in love all over again. With men, Manhattan and yourself."

  Shiri Appleby, actress, HBO's Girls

  "A subtly addicting, fun, and fast-paced story about the realty of twenty-something dating in NYC."

  Courtney Hamilton, author, Almost Royalty

  "A fast-paced, roller-coaster ride through the giddy peaks and Death Valleys of dating in your twenties in the big city, looking for love, and finding yourself."

  Phoebe Fox, author, The Break-Up Doctor

  "For any woman who has ever chased love only to find themselves…this book is for you."

  Mandy Hale, creator & author, The Single Woman

  "…Knapp’s book combines love and life in a beautiful twist within the borders of one of the loudest, craziest cities in the world, New York City. But what's most interesting is how the characters find solace in the noise, find happiness in the chaos, and find love in the unique."

  Kate Avino, The Huffington Post and CEO of Her Culture magazine

  "What Happens To Men When They Move To Manhattan? is a fun and enjoyable read about a young woman in search of her happily ever after. Take it to the beach or snuggle up in bed and dig in.”

  Emily Liebert, award-winning author, You Knew Me When and When We Fall

  For my mom

  “Yet high over the city our line of yellow windows must have contributed their share of human secrecy to the casual watcher in the darkening streets, and I was him too, looking up and wondering. I was within and without, simultaneously enchanted and repelled by the inexhaustible variety of life.”

  F. Scott Fitzgerald

  Contents

  Cover

  Title Page

  Copyright

  Praise for Jill Knapp

  Dedication

  Chapter 1Amalia

  Chapter 2Olivia

  Chapter 3Amalia

  Chapter 4Olivia

  Chapter 5Amalia

  Chapter 6Olivia

  Chapter 7Amalia

  Chapter 8Olivia

  Chapter 9Amalia

  Chapter 10Olivia

  Chapter 11Amalia

  Chapter 12Olivia

  Chapter 13Amalia

  Chapter 14Olivia

  Chapter 15Amalia

  Chapter 16Olivia

  Chapter 17Amalia

  Chapter 18Olivia

  Chapter 19Amalia

  Chapter 20Olivia

  Chapter 21Amalia

  Chapter 22Olivia

  Chapter 23Amalia

  Chapter 24Olivia

  Chapter 25Amalia

  Chapter 26Olivia

  Chapter 28Amalia

  Chapter 30Olivia

  Chapter 31Amalia

  Chapter 32Olivia

  Chapter 33Amalia

  Also by Jill Knapp…

  Jill Knapp

  About HarperImpulse

  About the Publisher

  Chapter 1

  Amalia

  I could tell by the look on her face that she was expecting something from me. She was expecting something to be different. For me to be, in some way, changed.

  I’m Amalia Hastings, and on August 20th at 9:17 pm, I was home.

  Home. The word seemed funny to me because I didn’t have a home to go back to. I moved out of my apartment right before leaving for Brazil and after my friend-with-benefits, Michael, showed up at my apartment, asking me to stay. I hadn’t thought it through properly; I just knew I didn’t want to live in that apartment anymore. Before my trip to Brazil I packed up what little stuff I owned and put it in storage for when I returned, assuming I would deal with it then. Well, “then” has become “now”. So for tonight I was staying with my best friend Cassandra. Who was currently waving at me.

  I knew what she wanted. She wanted stories. Juicy ones that involved hot hookups on the sand. She wanted to see pictures. Pictures of the places I went, the food I ate, and the hot guys I met. She wanted me to run up to her in a sun dress, hair braided and skin tanned, and explain, no, to pontificate, to her how life-changing my trip was. She wanted me to playfully link her arm around mine and gush about how amazing it all was. How I was changed forever. That I had a new appreciation for life, food, and music. She wanted me to tell her that I would never be the same.

  But this isn’t the movies and I’m not Julia Roberts.

  The florescent lights above me flickered, making the airport look dark and ominous. I looked down at my hand as I pulled my rolling suitcase across the sticky, tiled floor. Not even my hand had acquired a tan. Three months in the Brazilian sun and my skin remained as pale as ever.

  Cassandra was looking right at me with wide, unblinking eyes. I walked a little slower.

  For some reason I couldn’t pinpoint, coming off the plane felt like a surreal experience to me. Although I was relieved to have landed, and I wouldn’t have wanted to stay in Brazil any longer, I still wasn’t utterly happy with being back. I wondered if it merely had to do with the fact that I had no apartment to go back to and was feeling pretty untethered from not having a proper home.

  There’s an old saying. I’m not really sure where it’s from or who said it first. Kind of the proverb equivalent of The House of the Rising Sun. It proffers, “Wherever you go, there you are”, and up until about one month ago I had no idea what it meant. But now it means everything. It rings in my ears like a scolding mother, repeating itself over and over again until I submit.

  I finally stood face to face with Cassandra, who was grinning like a fool at this point. She was dressed down for the night, wearing a purple racer-back tank top that showed off her summer glow, jeans, and gold flip-flops. Her blonde hair was pulled into a loose, messy bun and her make-up was minimal, apart from the extra-shiny, coral lip-gloss she was wearing. She reeked of summer.

&nbs
p; “Hey,” I offered, looking down at my sneakers. I wished I had more energy for her, but after ten hours on a plane it was all I could muster up.

  Cassandra cocked her head to the side and smiled. Her hair swung back and forth and she popped her hip out like a model in training. She looked as fierce as ever, even dressed-down in comfortable summer clothes.

  “That’s all I get? Get over here!” she said, pulling me in for a hug.

  I hugged her back for a moment and then pulled away, overcome with exhaustion and jet-lag. I smiled at Cassandra. She smelled like a salty coconut and I realized she had probably come straight from Fire Island, a beach not too far from Long Island and just outside of the city. That explained the dressed-down attire, but not the lip-gloss. Unless, of course, we were going straight back there from JFK airport.

  I looked back at the gate. Most people I knew hated airports, but I liked them. They offered a chance to escape. Get on a plane and in six hours from now you could be across the country. You could be in a different town, in a different house, with a different group of people. I think we all took that for granted.

  I could go back to Brazil right now. Or I could go somewhere else. I’ve never been to Cincinnati; I wonder what it’s like there. Or maybe Savannah. I could definitely live in Savannah! I took a step backwards, away from Cassie. Back toward the inside of the airport. She just smiled.

  “Very funny, Amalia!” she said through perfectly white teeth. “Don’t sneak away from me now. I’m so glad you’re back, I really missed you.”

  Cassie threw her arm over me and smushed our faces together. She whipped out her iPhone and flipped the camera application around so the front lens could be used and snapped a picture of the two of us. Before I knew it, she uploaded the picture to Facebook with the caption “So excited, Amalia is officially home!”

  Without glancing back, she walked a few feet in front of me and remained glued to her phone. The back of her Havaianas smacking onto her heels echoed throughout the now nearly empty hallway. I let out a long sigh that Cassandra didn’t hear and pulled my suitcase toward the exit. Yep, it was official. I was home.

  Chapter 2

  Olivia

  “Would you like a glass of wine?” Alex asked me, as he glided over to the liquor cabinet.

  “Red, please,” I craned my neck to answer.

  I was quite cozy on the couch. The last week of summer had come and gone in a blur of tapas restaurants and strolls in Central Park. Monday marked the first day of our second year in graduate school and I couldn’t wait for it to begin. Ask most people and they’ll tell you summer is their favorite month. Not me, I’m partial to autumn. Summer is too crowded here in Brooklyn. The restaurants open their side entrances to create manufactured, outdoor seating areas so New Yorkers can pretend like they’re enjoying a nice day outside. I’ve often heard people say that the city clears out on the weekends during the summer months. But I have yet to see this happen.

  Frankly, I’m a little sick of it.

  During the summer months, everyone is in “vacation mode”. Vacation mode for girls means they’ll actually go a day without flat-ironing their hair, and for guys it means they’ll just hookup more than usual.

  Autumn is different. Autumn is the time of the year that signals a new start for me. I always remember my mom putting me in my knee-length red dress and tucking my long brown hair behind my ears while scooting me off to school with a kiss on the forehead. Every first day of school, she would take a picture of me flaunting my new lunch box. For first grade it was “Where In The World Is Carmen Sandiego?”

  Now that I am an adult and no longer living in Rhode Island, I look forward to autumn even more. I do this essentially because I want everyone’s “vacation mode” to end, and for everything else to just go back to normal.

  Alex slipped in beside me, put the wine glasses down, and put his arm around my shoulders. I immediately let my head drop to the side to rest onto him. I was really into Alex. His deep, soulful eyes still sent as many shivers down my spine as the day we met. Next week would mark a year since we’d been together, and we had already made dinner reservations at some restaurant on Roosevelt Island that I had never heard of. Sandwiched in between Manhattan and Queens, Roosevelt Island was a small area in New York City. There isn’t a ton of nightlife there, but the housing is more affordable than Manhattan, and most apartments offer large, sweeping views of the Manhattan sky-line. It was mainly inhabited by young families. I didn’t really understand why he wanted to live there, but I guess there are worse places. Like the Bronx.

  “Last weekend before school starts back up, baby,” he said. He raised his right hand and smoothed down his hair. “Are you ready to do it all again?”

  “Just one more year after this, and then it will all be over,” I said, reaching for my wine.

  The fact that we still had two years left in school was wearing on me now more than ever. Alex and I were in a good place, but I worried about what all the stress of schoolwork was going to do to our relationship. At first it seemed perfect, we had something crucial in common. But I started to question if the pressure of finishing school and beginning our careers would be too much for our relationship to handle.

  “Have you spoken to Amalia yet?” he asked, now running his fingers through my hair.

  “No, I haven’t heard from her in a few weeks, actually. Why?”

  “I just saw on Facebook that she’s back,” he said, through a smirk.

  I had forgotten that Amalia was coming home tonight.

  “That’s right, today is the 20th.” I rubbed my forehead and let out a long, drawn-out sigh.

  Alex rolled his eyes and leaned back into the couch.

  “Why don’t you like her?” I asked, with a smile. “She’s never done anything to you.”

  “I’m just kidding around,” he uttered.

  I shot him a look.

  “What? I am!” he added. He cocked his head to the side and raised an eyebrow.

  I let out a small laugh. He was too cute to be mad at.

  Alex winked at me and took a sip of his wine. Alex and Amalia had always been terse with each other. Now that he and I were in a relationship, I really wanted them to get along. My college boyfriend, Nate, and my old roommate never saw eye to eye, and it made those two years of my life more difficult than needed.

  “I’d really appreciate it if you tried a little harder to be friendly toward her,” I said, raising my eyebrows. “She’s pretty cool, once you get to know her.”

  Alex took a large gulp of wine and widened his gorgeous eyes. They were my favorite feature about him.

  “Okay, Olivia, I’ll make you a deal. As long as she doesn’t give me a hard time, I will do my best to be her, you know,” he turned away.

  “Her what?” I goaded, smiling at his discomfort.

  “You know. Her friend,” he dramatically stuttered over the word “friend”.

  “That’s very noble of you, Alex. I appreciate the gesture.” I rolled my eyes.

  “It’s what I’m here for, my dear,” he whispered softly.

  He leaned over and brushed a piece of my hair from my face that had fallen out of my ponytail. I looked in his eyes and he kissed me. Softly and slowly. A moment later my blood pressure kicked up a few notches. I playfully pulled away, but then kissed his forehead to show my affection.

  “You kiss by the book,” I mumbled jokingly.

  “And you’re adorable,” he said with a smile.

  I pulled myself out of the daze and redirected our attention back to the topic at hand.

  “I wonder what’s going to happen with Michael now that she’s back,” I turned around on the couch and leaned into Alex. His arm immediately wrapped around me as I laid my head on his chest.

  “What do you mean?” he asked. He lifted me slightly and gently leant his head on top of mine.

  “Well, you know.” I took a sip of my wine and returned to using him as a body pillow.

  “I’m j
ust wondering if it’s going to be awkward between the two of them now that she’s back,” I offered, stretching to reach in my purse for my cigarettes.

  “Why would it be awkward?” he asked, stealing a cigarette from my pack.

  He inched up a bit and pulled a green lighter from his back pocket, lighting both of our cigarettes.

  I inhaled deeply and let the nicotine rush over me. I had been smoking since college and every year I swore I was going to quit.

  “Because they were hooking-up for the better part of last year,” I said. “And it’s probably going to be a little weird for them now. Honestly, I just don’t want to deal with any of the drama. Amalia’s my friend, but you should have heard her go on and on about Michael last semester. It was exhausting.”

  I took another long drag of my cigarette, and ashed into the ceramic tray centered on the coffee table.

  “What the hell are you talking about?” he said, now gently moving me to sit upright. “When were they hooking-up? Wasn’t Michael dating that Marge chick last year?”

  I hadn’t spoken about Amalia and Michael’s indiscretion to Alex. I had always assumed he knew, that Michael had at some point told him. But even if Michael had never said anything, he really should have been able to figure it out by now.

  “Wow, babe.” I muttered, shaking my head. “Just wow.”

  I guess the cat was now out of the bag.

  Chapter 3

  Amalia

  “I was thinking it would be fun if we could go for brunch Sunday,” I said to Cassandra. “We and Olivia should have a girl’s day. You know, before school starts back up on Monday. What do you think?”